Healing the Pain That Haunts You

Trauma therapy for adults in Oklahoma navigating PTSD, emotional wounds, and the pain of a past that won't let go

When the Past Won’t Stay in the Past

Trauma and PTSD aren’t just about what happened—they’re about how it changed you. They live on in the form of anxiety that never fully quiets, a body that can’t fully relax, and relationships that feel harder than they should.

You may not even call it trauma—but if something painful from your past is still shaping how you feel, respond, or relate to others, this is for you.

Maybe it looks like:

  • Overthinking everything you say or do

  • Shutting down emotionally when things feel overwhelming

  • Feeling like you're constantly on edge or disconnected from your body

  • Struggling with boundaries, perfectionism, or people-pleasing

  • Panic attacks, nightmares, or unexplained physical symptoms

These aren’t character flaws. They’re survival responses—your body and brain doing their best to keep you safe.

Common Symptoms of PTSD & Unresolved Trauma

Even if the trauma is long behind you, its effects may still linger in your nervous system, body, and mind.

You might experience symptoms like:

    • Nightmares, flashbacks, or intrusive memories

    • Panic attacks or feeling constantly on edge

    • Intense shame, guilt, or self-blame

    • Difficulty trusting others or feeling emotionally numb

    • Feeling hopeless or chronically sad

    • Avoiding certain people, places, or topics

    • Pushing people away or feeling unworthy of love

    • Over-apologizing, over-explaining, or people-pleasing

    • Struggling with intimacy or setting healthy boundaries

    • Hypervigilance and difficulty relaxing

    • Trouble sleeping or waking up in a jolt

    • Chronic headaches, muscle tension, or digestive issues

    • Feeling trapped in your body or disconnected from it

You're not broken—your body is still trying to protect you.

These symptoms aren't personal failures.

They’re survival responses that once kept you safe.

Childhood Trauma: Why It Still Hurts

Some of the deepest wounds are the ones no one else saw.
You may have looked “fine” on the outside, even while you were hurting.

The pain of childhood trauma lingers because children don’t just experience hard things—they internalize them. They blame themselves. They believe they’re the problem. That belief stays rooted unless it’s named and healed.

You might still carry the impact if:

  • You were criticized more than comforted

  • You had to grow up too soon and care for yourself or others

  • Your parents were emotionally unavailable, volatile, or dismissive

  • You learned to suppress your needs and feelings to avoid conflict

  • You never felt safe to be vulnerable or fully yourself

Childhood trauma often flies under the radar—but it shapes everything.
Healing it now is one of the most powerful things you can do.

What Counts as Trauma?

Trauma is not just what happened—it’s what stayed with you.

Trauma isn’t only about the event—it’s about the impact. It’s about how your body and nervous system responded, and how those responses may still be shaping your life today.

Trauma can come from:

  • A single overwhelming event (like an accident, assault, or natural disaster)

  • Repeated emotional invalidation or neglect

  • Growing up in an unpredictable, unsafe, or emotionally chaotic home

  • Being in a relationship where you had to suppress your needs or walk on eggshells

  • Chronic exposure to high-stress, life-threatening, or emotionally taxing environments—such as those experienced by first responders

This is especially true for those living with C-PTSD (Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder)—which often comes from chronic, relational trauma like childhood emotional neglect or psychological abuse.

While PTSD is often linked to a one-time event, C-PTSD is rooted in ongoing experiences that shape how you view yourself and the world.

Whether the pain was obvious or subtle, if it hurt you, changed you, or made you feel unsafe—it counts.

Trauma and the Nervous System: Why You Still Feel Stuck

Trauma affects more than your memories—it reprograms how your body and brain respond to life.

When something overwhelming happens, your system goes into survival mode:

Fight
Irritability, anger, controlling behavior
You might feel quick to snap or the need to manage everything tightly.

Flight
Anxiety, overworking, restlessness
You might keep yourself constantly busy to avoid emotions.

Freeze
Numbness, dissociation, avoidance
You might feel detached or shut down when things get overwhelming.

Fawn
People-pleasing, over-apologizing, blurred boundaries
You might lose yourself trying to stay safe in relationships.

These patterns are not flaws—they’re deeply wired responses designed to keep you alive.

The problem is, your nervous system may still be operating like the threat is happening right now—even if you're safe.

The good news? The brain and body can change. With the right support, you can retrain your nervous system to recognize safety, relax into connection, and feel more in control of your responses again.

What Healing Looks Like Here

You don’t have to know where to start. You just need a space where your pain is allowed to exist—and where change is possible.

I use a trauma-informed, attachment-based approach that supports both emotional healing and nervous system regulation:

  • EMDR therapy to reduce the emotional intensity of traumatic memories

  • Parts work (IFS) to compassionately explore the inner parts of you that still hold pain, fear, or shame

  • Somatic practices to help you reconnect with your body and shift out of survival mode

  • Insight-based therapy to help you reframe and make sense of your story

  • Experiential techniques to help move emotion in the room when words fall short

We’ll go at a pace that feels safe. You’re always in control of your healing.

We begin by building safety—emotionally, physically, and relationally:

  • Learn to regulate emotions and stay grounded

  • Create a stable foundation where you feel supported

  • Strengthen your ability to explore the past without getting overwhelmed

  • Ensure your voice and consent guide every step of the process

Your healing won’t be rushed. It will be real.

No, we can’t erase what happened. But we can change how it lives in your body and mind now.

Pain that stays hidden doesn’t disappear. It becomes shame, disconnection, self-doubt.

But pain that’s witnessed, shared, and honored? It transforms.

  • We can reduce the intensity of the pain

  • Rewire the beliefs it left behind

  • Break the patterns it created

  • Help you respond differently to your spouse, your kids, your inner critic

You can be the person you want to be—not just the one who survived.

Healing can look like:

  • Feeling calm and safe in your body

  • Setting boundaries without shame

  • Sleeping deeply and waking rested

  • Trusting yourself and others again

  • Letting go of perfectionism

  • Finally feeling free

You're Not Too Far Gone

My clients would describe me as warm and honest.

This work isn’t always easy, but I’ll walk beside you with clarity and care.

Sometimes my office is the first place a client has ever felt fully seen.

What if you gave yourself that chance?

You are not too complicated.

You are not too much.

And it is not too late.

But Kristen, What’s the Point? We Can’t Undo the Past.